"Accolades For Valor" by Matthew Johnson (1993): "She goes through life, gliding, a benevolent seer/ Stopping constantly to aid those in need, those not even dear/ I, an individual, swept up in the storm/ Of a woman, who, in search of herself, defies the norm/ As I, an outcast, fighting myself, yet daring to believe/ That if I ask her aid and succor (and possibly love) she won’t leave/ Giving her heart, mind and soul to every known cause/ Causing me to look about my selfish malestrom, and in introspection give pause/ For all her words, she won’t write about me, does she fail to perceive/ What the object knows to be true and what make believe—/ Words rarely present, presence much more of one/ Is to wish for more as good as wishing for the sun?/ Energy is precious, as I know well to be true/ And I am curious to know, Lorraine, what I can ask of you/ Names are important, they make us who we are/ Much more important than people give credit, by far/ The masses may cry “Lori!” and let them do so!/ For the numbers who call that cannot understand/ They will never know the Lorraine inside, the one crying to live/ Will be forever frustrated by those whose minds are like a sieve/ There may be those who rob her of her world, let them scratch the skin/ They are as pinpricks to the steel within/ These accolades are not exaggeration, not pretentious/ I Just want you to know that there is at least one who is conscious/ That the world is a better place for the life of a woman named Lorraine."

Monday, April 01, 1991

Fighting A Lost Cause

Who is to say the power lies in their hands?
They--the ones who control the land;
Who got them where they are?
Who says they're up to par?

(chorus:)
Helpless
Left to my own devices
Helpless
Trying to break through
Helpless
A lost soul trapped in awes
Helpless
Fighting a lost cause

Barriers keeping me from leading the way.
Fucking stop signs centering my stage.
Age; time; authority; supreme being;
How did they get their powerful meanings?
What gives them the force that screws me?
Is there an exit from such an eternity?

(repeat chorus)

(bridge:)
I can climb. I climb. I reach high, but I miss.
I work. I fight, but I slip into the abyss.
Constant thought process and tedious labor
getting me nowhere but against my neighbor.

(repeat chorus)

Why should anything or anyone hold me back?
Who is one to line my tracks?
What makes rules stand? Why is the because the why?

I'm tired of just watching life go by.


*dedicated to Sarah Horne*
April 1991