Too Familiar

His hair rustling in the wind;
on his face a familiar grin;
In conversation with another soul;
I felt a peculiar feeling grow.

He looked into my eyes,
making my temperature rise.
My pupils becoming windows inside;
sudenly transparent--just can't hide.

Quickly, I had to close my eyes.
Do I really want to see this sight?

I loked at his face and froze with fear.
What was my first love doing here?
He mirrors the image I remember--
the one that haunts my heart forever.

Though I know he has mind and soul of his own,
I can't help but let myself go
treading through a past I thought was heaven.
Was this a second chance being given?

Is he here just to remind me of the pain?
A crash course cruise through memory lane?
Or, is here--variance and diversity,
another being wandering the university?

Should I just let him wander on,
and watch the past become twice gone?
The feelings re-radiate through me.
I remember how happy I once could be,

but I also remember that hurt comes with it,
and how true love is just a myth. It's
funny.
My eyes are open,
but I can see better with my eyes closed.

October 10, 1994

I Wish You Were Here

I'm sitting here confused; staring at the wall.
I'm nibbling at my fingertips; hoping you will call.
It's all happening so fast and strange,
but the best things in life aren't really arranged.

The wait to see you again seems eternal.
This growing flame is becoming an inferno.
Common sense says my head's up too high,
but my heart says this is so right.

Why won't the queasiness go away?
Will we ever see the day?

(chorus:)
How many ways can I say I wish you were here?
How many times can I say I want you near?
I want so bad the chance to hold you tight
'cause when we're together, it just feels right.

My thoughts are with you each and every night.
I close my eyes and see with second sight.
I've never felt so strong the desire to support someone.
That's how I know something special has begun.
I'm filled with warmth just listening to your voice.
You brighten my days with simple joys.

All you have to do is be yourself,
and it's a royal flush you've dealt.
I'm longing for the day I can be at your side
to help you make your dreams take flight.

(repeat chorus)

Oh I wish you were here.
Oh I wish you were here.
I want so bad the chance to hold you tight
'cause when we're together, it just feels right.
Oh I wish you were here.
Oh I wish you were here.
Oh how I wish you were here!

October 5, 1994

Stuck In The Prologue

My mind has turned to a faceless page,
leaving me imprisoned in my psyche's cage.
Major determinants in my future's existence
are filling me with want but resistance.

Where shall I go from here?
My veins quickly surge with fear.
I think I know what Iwant,
but, Oh, how the demons taunt.

Impossibility blackens such color,
and sadly there is no rebuttle.
No fight do I have for fate;
the only hope I have is wait,

but that doesn't guarantee much.
It's as helpful as a broken crutch.
Why is it I always come so close?
It never quite comes before it goes.

My mind has actually offered me a peek
of what heaven is--a pleasure leak?
I even caught a glimpse of Earth,
and my heart immediately valued its worth.

I can see nights illuminated and alive,
and I can feel more pump and drive,
but obstacles hinder.
The flame kindles.

Oh! What shall surface the pages to come?
I don't know whether to embrace or run.
I'll just try to hold back tears,
wondering how to get through these years.

October 1, 1994